I wouldn't draw the line at "community", I'd draw it at "identity". It's one thing to be something, for example, I'm a picky eater, it's another to build your existence around that fact. Being a picky eater is not part of my identity, it doesn't define who I am, it's part of who I am, surely, and I wholeheartedly accept it, but if I woke up one day and craved some cauliflowers I would still be me.
I could be a part of some picky eater community, I guess, but I would quickly grow uncomfortable with it if it revolved around cherishing and celebrating how we are picky eaters.
I think at some point we took a wrong turn in the identity-based paradigm of society we now find ourselves into, and in our zeal to achieve self-acceptance, empathy and compassion we went from "you don't have to be defined by things you don't want to be defined by" to "you are defined by these and that's great". Everybody is free to base their identity around whatever they want of course, but I can hardly think of anything more dull than basing your being around some mental quirk.
Your identity is anything you define yourself with. You just identified yourself as a picky eater -- that's part of your identity. However, you choose not to make it a celebrated, core, or significant part of your identity. That's fine.
If you said "I am not a picky eater ", that's denying it's part of your identity.
Ones identity is simply the set of all traits they would use to self describe. Parts of one's identity people will push forward and parts they'll not ever emphasize or show.
ADHD is not a "mental quirk". It's a serious condition that often make people incompatible with modern world. It's like being blind. Everything blind person is doing in his/her life is affected by being blind.
I could be a part of some picky eater community, I guess, but I would quickly grow uncomfortable with it if it revolved around cherishing and celebrating how we are picky eaters.
I think at some point we took a wrong turn in the identity-based paradigm of society we now find ourselves into, and in our zeal to achieve self-acceptance, empathy and compassion we went from "you don't have to be defined by things you don't want to be defined by" to "you are defined by these and that's great". Everybody is free to base their identity around whatever they want of course, but I can hardly think of anything more dull than basing your being around some mental quirk.